Wednesday, August 29, 2012


I'm not entirely sure where this post is going yet, so you may have to bear with me a little bit.

Having started the day on a very negative note I have to say I think the socks did as good a job as could be expected of them!  The things that may have been awkward at work after the events of yesterday weren't quite as bad as expected, although I'm not going to go as far as to say that all was well.  Thankfully the gift of a sherbet lemon at the crucial time kept me going (thanks!).

I have done entirely too much thinking today, but have come to the conclusion that I feel a bit like I'm "in limbo".  There's a couple of big things pending, both of which have a number of different outcomes, and until these are resolved I'm stuck doing little but waiting.  Whilst waiting for these things to conclude I'm stuck.  Unable to move forward, so just plodding through the days (apparently with too much time to think and get myself in a "tizz" about things...).

The start of one of the resolutions will be underway 4 weeks today.  That's good.  Although at the same time I'm nervous (far too worried about it with this much time to go!).  The other is a bit further away, but there will be things that need to be done along the way so that one shouldn't be so bad (especially as I have the first thing to focus on!).  This means I have 28 days to get through, not that I'm counting.

My vague plan is to just keep counting.  And to try and do things each day (well, on the days that I'm not at work) which will keep things interesting.  Everything has got a bit samey at the moment and I think that's been contributing to my general grumpy state! Some of these things might be big, like the fact I have 2 trips to London planned in the next 7 days, and others small, like working my way through my pile of books.  I need to learn too, I'm not used to this being out of education malarky, I've got a couple of medical textbook type things so I hope to be able to read through bits of those too and keep my brain in gear!

I'm hoping that by doing that I won't have time to think about the rubbish things which my brain always tends to meander to by default.  

The alternative is that it all goes horribly wrong, and all I end up doing is tiring myself out even more and ending up as some kind of gibbering wreck in a few weeks time (and I'm sure I've been getting close to that!).

I think I've got a book to go and lose myself in now then, at least if I can manage to hold it up.  Feeling rather broken after yesterday, and then work.  Although it's almost a pleasant change to have things other than my arm hurting!

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